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Raqueli CV on The Status Quo
Belén Cusi (@BelenCu… on The Status Quo
Raqueli CV on The Status Quo
Raqueli CV on The Status Quo
Belén Cusi on The Status Quo

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I’ve been noticing a curious topic come up in different conversations and scenarios in the past weeks with friends and various people that I felt the urge to express a thought.

The topic/question was –

What is your status?

First, what?

What is the real question here, and what does this even mean?

Before answering, lets define –

[Status]
is the position of affairs at a particular time.

Ok, so what position are we referring to here exactly? If this were directed to me, are we asking about:

My relationship status? Which relationship?

My relationship to you? To them? To him? To myself?

My relationship to life perhaps —?

This would seem the most appropriate to address I suppose.

I am alive. That is my status.

I am living.
I am breathing.
I am happy.
I am still.
I am moving.
I am experiencing.
I am falling.
I am getting up.
I am feeling. All the time.
All the feelings.
The fun ones. The uncomfortable ones. The confusing ones. The sexy ones. The ones I post about. The ones people keep in the dark. They’re all here.

A colorful merry-go-round lets say.

Is this answer satisfying though?

People seem to be so focused or concerned with this idea of a having a ‘status’ or not nowadays that they forget to bring attention to what it even means to so instantly define.

For example, please select one of the following:

Are you:

  • Single
  • In a relationship
  • It’s complicated
  • Other

If you selected any of the first three, I would say you didn’t give much thought to this.

Per the dictionary (and those that indeed took some time to think these through);

[Single]
1.Only one, not one of several
2. an individual person or thing rather than part of a pair or a group.

[Relationship]
1. the state of being related or interrelated.

[Complicated]
1. consisting of many interconnecting parts or elements; intricate, more difficult

Lets play with this for a moment.

Off the bat – looking at all of these definitions – I would almost dare say I am all of them and none of them at the same time.

I’m definitely, only one, not one of several. Always in a state of being interrelated. Usually consisting of interconnecting parts or elements, no doubt.

But now, don’t get me wrong. I am not dismissing the beauty of a partnership in which one would acknowledge they are in a loving, reciprocal and intimate relationship with another person. I am just saying that if that is not the case – my state of being isn’t “singular” or not relating to any others either.

And using the term complicated to define any part of myself or any of my experiences, just carries such a heavy negative connotation that I would never even entertain it in the description of my relations, especially referring to friends or lovers.

Those experiences and states of being just are. They are different. Different from the common boxes that have been outlined for us to select from.

What if instead, the multiple choice selection looked something like:

I am:

  • Exploring
  • Chilling
  • Playing
  • Learning
  • Practicing Intimacy
  • Loving one
  • Loving many
  • Loving all
  • Loving myself
  • Loving. Period.

There’s no real answer guys. Only you know what feels right for you and what can begin to define your everyday experience, your states of being, your position of ‘affairs’ or events.

It’s probably also the most genuine way to connect to another; evaluating first how you see yourself in all of this and identifying what you really value and seek to have in common with someone else.

And before checking off any boxes, ask yourself instead –

What are you not willing to compromise when entertaining a new experience (person, event, ‘affair’); and for how long will you lower any standards (values) you’ve worked on and kept true just for the sake of this experience – before allowing a better one to enter and learning to let go?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

6 comments on “The Status Quo

  1. Roman Eggenberger says:

    “I am alive. That is my status.” Such a powerful statement! I was once afraid of saying this because I knew very well that I wasn’t living my life as if I was alive. It was all about survival in a system that wasn’t made for me. I switched worlds. It can be scary at times, but at least it makes my life worthwhile. Thank you so much for sharing.

    1. Raqueli CV says:

      Thank you for reading ❤ !! Sending love x

  2. Belén Cusi says:

    Beautiful, thoughtful writing and contemplation. Your style reminds me of my own. Hope you continue posting!

    1. Raqueli CV says:

      Belén! ❤ que bello mensaje. Significa mucho para mi! Escribo mucho y posteo poco jeje – me anima mucho tu comentario a subir mas! Gracias por leer, me encantaría ver lo tuyo también! xx

      1. Gracias hermosa. De verdad, me tocó tu escritura y me encantaría invitarte a un café en estas semanas – si te divierte charlar y conocernos. Me cuesta encontrar gente en la misma sintonía… ando en la búsqueda. Yo últimamente tengo la escritura abandonada, pero tengo pendiente retomarla…quizás este post que interezca: https://belencusi.tumblr.com/post/180266802365/contemplations.
        Todo mi archive de textos ese este: https://belencusi.tumblr.com/archive/filter-by/text
        Xo

      2. Raqueli CV says:

        Sii! Me encantaria ❤ ! Estoy en Colorado hasta Diciembre en un proyecto pero desde que regrese, hagámoslo!

        Esta noche chequeo tu blog también ❤ Fuerte abrazos xx

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